Quick Update--Re: Cancer

So...John (my step-dad) was supposed to have a doctor's appointment today (for those of you who don't know, he was diagnosed with small cell lung cancer towards the end of 2008). I got a call from my mom about 45 minutes ago saying that they were admitting him to the hospital (yet again) because he needs a transfusion. Now, I know that it is very common for people with cancer who go through radiation and chemo to become anemic and need transfusions, but in light of things I have recently heard, this sounds bad.

My mom told me the other day that she does not think that John is going to make it through this. Even though John went into remission (apparently) after two rounds of chemo, the cancer does not appear to be getting any better, and it does not appear to be getting any worse either. I'm not really sure what this means / how long doctors think John has left...but I'm not really sure I want to know.

As I'm sure most (if not all) of you know, I lost my dad to pancreatic cancer in december of 2007. For a while doctors were struggling trying to figure out what he had, and even when they did figure it out, I don't think I actually found out until a couple months before he died. I'm not really sure where I'm going with this ::shrug::

Sometimes I wish that when it came to health issues, everything could be handled in a Grey's Anatomy fashion. I love that show, and even though I am waaaaay behind (I'm still on season two because I've been watching it on DVD and I only got the first season like last Hannukkah or something and I got the second season this Hannukkah and just finished watching it last night) I feel like when someone is seriously sick (like cancer, heart disease, something like that) that their family is almost always around them, and get to hear news / diagnoses almost immediately. I feel like in a way that might make things harder (and sometimes it does) but at the same time, I feel it is better sometimes just to know.

To change the subject again, I wish that John would just come home / find a way to be comfortable. When my dad died he was in his house, sleeping in one of his really comfortable zero gravity chairs in his living room. As sure as I am that my dad was probably in pain, I am also quite sure that they were able to get it under control. John, on the other hand, is weird when it comes to pain and medication. Most medications that would normally work for people, either don't work for John, or work for a little while and then he kind of builds up a tolerance to them. ::SHRUG:: I just feel bad because I feel like he shouldn't have to deal with this pain for the rest of his life.

I guess that's all for now. I have to go get ready to go into the city for the EC Concert Choir tour concert :D I'm soooo excited!!! :D I get to see my EC loves!!! <3 More soon. If not tomorrow, then when I get back from Cali. Have a good week, everyone!!

--Emily